What Am I Too Old For???

DOR- The upcoming election season has me thinking about age. Are you ever too old to do anything? I think the answer lies not with the number of years you’ve been alive but with how well you’ve borne the blows. I have a friend whose parents are in their 90s and are still skiing! Oh the joy on their faces as they swoosh down those icy hills of New Hampshire. We all have to be honest with ourselves at some point and say, am I doing something that might endanger myself or others because my acquity isn’t what it used to be? Whatever happened to bowing out gracefully? I feel like that was such an honorable thing. But now, folks want to hold onto power with one hand and their canes in the other. Discuss! 

DAR- It is so reflective of the differences between us, my friend, that, for you, the arrival of spring conjures up images of primary elections and their elderly political participants, while for me, spring warrants consideration of wearable swimming costumes as this season gives way to the next one with all of its heat and summery skin exposure. Can we still rock that sexy bikini?  Or, is it time for the full coverage burkini? 

Not surprisingly, both beachwear and older politicians beg a similar answer to the question that you ask. When are we too old to sport a lot of skin or run for reelection? I’d like to think-as someone else once said- that old age is exactly 15 years older than I currently am. And because I am infuriated by the sweeping attitude that only youth is valued in our society I say, keep on till you can’t anymore.

That said, there are a few things that age has changed for me.

-The length of my skirts. They’re longer.

-My patience for uninteresting or annoying people. It’s shorter.

-Plunging necklines. For a thousand reasons.

-An increased risk avoidance with potential physical danger. I won’t skydive, bungee jump or even ski anymore. I don’t have enough time left for recovery.

-Spontaneous sex. Only proper preparation prevents poor performance. (Maybe this is a subject for another time!)

DOR- I’ll grant you this: the only people who really have any business determining whether you are “too old” for something, are you, your family, your doctor, and, in rare instances (we hope), every registered voter in the United States of America.

Still, I do want to make the argument for the “graceful exit.” I think the sweet spot is when it’s announced that you will finally be relinquishing a role, that the people around you are genuinely surprised and sad to see you go – in equal measure – as opposed to someone yelling from the back, “it’s about damn time, for fucks sake!” I don’t think any job is for life. There’s a retirement age for good reason – to push us back into the daylight before it’s too late!

We Americans also place such a premium on work, we forget the opposite of working is LIVING. As the seasoned (not old — see I’m learning!) saying goes, no one ever pronounced from their deathbed, ‘I wish I spent more time at work.’ I DO think women are more likely to lean OUT gracefully because the years of juggling work and family takes a toll. And girls just wanna have fun. Men just wanna stay No. 1.

Ok, let’s get to the juicy stuff. I think you are wise to not participate in any sport that has an ambulance waiting, just in case. I’m with you on that. As far as clothing goes, women should wear what makes them feel happy, sexy and confident. And pile on the accessories in memory of (style icon) Iris Apfel.

And, as far as sex goes, keep it frequent, however it has to happen. This is another instance of no one wanting to hear “It’s about damn time, for fucks sake!” from the hecklers in the back.

DAR-So well said, Dor. Although any age limits us to some degree – no one wants to see a 4-year old operating heavy machinery, it has to be attitude and gumption that determine the process of aging well. Maya Angelou provides great wisdom on the matter of continuing to LIVE before you die

“What I have learned so far about aging, despite the creakiness of one’s  bones, and cragginess of one’s once silken skin, is this, DO IT. By all means, DO IT.

DOR-LOL Frankly I don’t want a 4 year old or an 84 year old operating heavy machinery -or, ON ME for that matter. Plus let us make room for and appreciate the young, hot docs shall we? Paging Dr. McDreamy!
And thank you, Maya, ever the sage.