
Writer’s block, according to Wikipedia, “is a condition, primarily associated with writing, in which an author loses the ability to produce new work or….original ideas.”
FEAR, rather than dwindling creativity, I venture, is the common culprit here. And no wonder, with this era of cancellation culture growing ever more extreme by the day.
“Oh, I would caution against printing that,” my late husband had advised after reading the draft of a piece I was intending to write about a mutual friend.
“I’m not insulting him,” I explained.
“Well, he’ll still be insulted,” he said.
I put away the piece for re-editing and softened it a bit.
“He’ll still know it’s about him,” warned a friend.
Hmmmph. So this is how inspiration dies. You create, then question yourself, develop a conscience and consider repercussions. Then all of a sudden there’s nothing left to say. And, in fact, people are deciding not to say anything at all for fear of creating micro offenses, confirms AI.
“A 2022 survey found that 40% of Americans withhold their beliefs for fear of reprisal, a figure higher than during the McCarthyism era of the 1950s.”
This is a rhetorical question: But if you can’t write about human foibles so observable in the people around you, where is there to turn for fresh material? People are the most interesting creatures on the planet.
While I was co-hosting a “live” radio talk show I described a week-end dinner with a couple who had taken it upon themselves to order their favorite wine. A red. Astronomically priced. What’s worse, I don’t like red. I suggested to our listening audience that if someone wants to go off-piste with their pricey wine selection, with no group discussion before ordering, then perhaps they should pay for it themselves. Although I never mentioned them by name, the female of the couple had heard the show and left me a voicemail message.
“That wasn’t us you were talking about today was it, sweetie?”
Well, yeah.
Bad behavior recognized, at least. Whether they change it or not is another matter. Was I supposed to feel shame getting caught out for expressing my opinion? Should I just shut up when injustices arise?
On the larger conversational plane, politics and religion are such polarizing subjects that I now rarely offer up my opinion unless I have already sussed out the position of my social company. For instance, it became clear that an acquaintance had strong views about the political state of our world and the most powerful man in it. I nodded my head to all that she decried-seemingly in agreement- even though I was not. Cowardice on my part? Actually, my reluctance to challenge her was the result of her statement that she would have a hard time liking anyone who disagreed with her. So, of course, I stayed mum, except to say,
“It would be a shame if one “unlikeable” part of a person’s life obliterated all the rest of his or her good character.” And she, thankfully, agreed.
But that doesn’t mean great divides won’t continue to exist because of idealogical inflexibility. Even among friends. It’s surprising how some great mates I know completely fell out with one another once they each learned how the other had voted, for instance. Apparently they all thought they were “like minded” and were shocked-almost betrayed-when they learned otherwise.
Expressing disappointment in the workplace is another environment fraught with risk since a judge ruled that
“Telling a co-worker they “let colleagues down” by taking sick leave amounts to harassment, an employment tribunal has ruled,” according to the LONDON TELEGRAPH which explained,
“A tribunal awarded a teacher, who took leave after a back operation and was criticised by a manager, almost £140,000 in compensation. Adam Partington, an employment judge, said that voicing disappointment following a colleague’s absence can be “offensive.”
Sadly, the fear of offending has resulted in an uneasy detent for many. The “don’t ask, don’t tell” mentality seems like a fraudulent way to live, but it is the safest way to behave these days until we’re all a bit more brave and respectful of other’s opinions.
According to the philanthropic community, StandTogether.Org, “Students also feel pressure to conform. The authors cite a 2021 FIRE study (foundation for individual rights and expression) that found 80% of college students say they have self-censored their beliefs. Slightly more than that, 81%, say they feel pressured to avoid discussing controversial subjects in class.”
What’s more, a 2024 FIRE Study of 55 universities found that their professors are “four times more likely to self censor than during the Cold War.”
How does a student learn or a teacher teach if so many subjects have become verboten? Shock talk Howard Stern’s candor backfired on him in a big way with his own family once. Stern described the profoundly sad moment he and his first wife suffered a miscarriage. Being a talk show host, he discussed it with his listeners. Being a private person she, naturally, was enraged and felt betrayed. His response was basically,
“Hey, I’m on the air for four hours a day. I have to talk about what I know. And my personal life is what I know best.”
Stern has few filters. Maybe that is why he has been such a successful and entertaining broadcaster to his audience for over two decades.
This episode aside, consider it flattery when you are the center of reportorial attention. Unless you are Prince Andrew, of course. But even as the target of “bad press” and worse deeds, you would hope he’d learn something about honesty and self humility.
In an ongoing effort to avoid writer’s block, I shall continue to use the human race as a rich source of inspiration for essays and the like. How can I not? You are all so fantastically interesting, flawed and talented in equal parts, inspiring and most generous to provide me with such overflowing vats of intoxicating story ideas.
So, I want to thank you all very much for giving meaning to my life and for helping us both to develop thicker skins. And, to anyone who may someday recognize themselves in this space, may I say this. Don’t doubt your instincts. If it sounds like you, chances are it is you. Stop being offended. Opt for enlightenment, or at the very least, a laugh.
(Thank You Getty Images)